FELLOW DIRTBAG REVIEWS HIS EUROVAN STAY

My climbing partner, Nate Pakula, wrote this "Review" about the Eurovan in April of 2009, while taking a rest day in Joshua Tree.

This is day four of my most recent Eurovan stay. From the backseat, this is what I see: the dashboard-clipboard (covered with Chase’s To-Do Lists), a partial gallon of white gas, the pink shaving razor/toothbrush cup, my guitar, a can of WD-40, Chase’s life, my crap, a little of other people’s crap. It’s all in here, just about anything one would ever need. The true dirtbag domicile. Need a dictionary? Got you covered. Or a tomato? No problem, just look in Chase’s purse, nestled between her duct tape wallet and a wad of receipts.

Life is pleasantly simple as a guest of the Eurovan, especially once you’re checked off to close the sliding door. (Chase won’t let you close the door without her permission.  Without just the right speed and pressure applied to the door, it will fall off the hinge.)

Everyone should have a stay in this traveling dorm room. Sleeping in the pop-top at night, or drinking Horchata in the back seat on a sunny day in the parking lot of Coyote Corner…ah…there’s nothing quite like it.

EUROVAN STAY REVIEW, Out of 5 Stars

Hospitality: 5

Dining: 4  (some outdated goods)

Cleanliness: 3  (valiant effort though)

Storage: 5 (remember where you put it)

Wake-up Call: 4

Peanut Butter Supply: 5

Tampon Accessibility from ANYWHERE in the Van: 5

Sliding Door: 2

Heady Tunes: 4.5

Wi-Fi: No

Charging Capabilities: 5

Cassette Tape Library: 5 (Van Halen, David Bowie, Grateful Dead, Neil Young…enough said)

Rear Seat Table: Yes

Several Bags of Empty Beer Bottles: Sometimes